Sisters, when we are young, it is quite easy to be impressed by a handsome face, a charming smile, or a man who makes us laugh. This appeals to us because it makes us feel good, and it feels as if we are special in order to be able to attract such a guy.
But a cute man is not necessarily a good man and, it’s important to remember, a good man (as understood by the world) isn’t necessarily a godly man.
Sisters, a man’s good looks can fade. Charm often deceives. And things such as shared interests, financial success, and romantic feelings are not a foundation for a Christian to build a God-honoring marriage upon.
If you have a father who is concerned for your soul and your future, listen to him. Seek his wisdom as to whom you ought to wed. If you don’t, perhaps you have other family members who can give you godly advice and guidance as you seek to find the man who will one day lead your family. Avail yourself of such wisdom, be it from you father, a godly family member, or your pastor. But if it falls to you alone, and it shouldn’t, then seek your future husband through prayer, godliness, and by measuring him according to the Word.
Remember, we mustn’t simply ask, “Does this man make me happy?” Rather, we ought to sincerely and prayerfully ask, “Does this man truly love and obey the Lord? Will he represent Him well to our family?” and “Will he lead me well in a way that honors the Lord?”
Do not settle for a man who merely claims to be a Christian or one who faithfully attends church. This means nothing if godly fruit isn’t present in his life.
Sisters, look for the fruit of genuine, Christ-exalting, faith.
Does he love, believe, and obey God’s Holy Word, even when it’s made difficult by others?
Does he take sin seriously and is he seeking to kill it in his own life?
Is he a masculine man who understands his position as the head of, protector of, and provider of his future family?
Does he pursue righteousness even when no one is watching him?
1 Timothy 6: 11, “But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness.”
A godly man will not be perfect, but he will be striving to honor God in all ways. He will desire to provide, protect, lead faithfully, repent when he is wrong, and love his wife according to Scripture. He will be able to say “No” when necessary, be it to you or to others.
Sisters, please seek a man who will lead you toward holiness rather than away from it. Seek a man who loves God more than he loves you, because only then will he be able to love you rightly.
Do not be smitten by outward appearance while overlooking godly character. A man may be small in stature and yet mighty in faith. He may be quiet and unassuming, yet courageous, steady, and dependable. He may be overlooked in this world, but a God-fearing man who stands for truth when few others will.
Sisters, pray for wisdom, understanding, and discernment. Be patient. Look beyond the outward. Look at his character.
Pray for a man whom you can willingly follow and submit to. One whom you trust. One who is wise, has integrity, and who is a student of the Word and will lead you in study of it and in God’s ways. Pray for a man who will lead you in prayer. A man who will work hard, one you can trust in times of suffering, and one whom you can trust to raise children in righteousness and teach them the ways of Christ.
Seek a godly man with whom you can grow old in faithfulness to God and one another.
Sisters, a man who loves the Lord with all his heart, soul, mind, and strength is a treasure worth waiting for.
Soli Deo Gloria!
